Sunday, December 26, 2010
I can't believe how much my life has changed in the past year. Last year, I was in a completely different place in my life. I never even thought about having a baby. I feel like I have grown up a lot from the person who I was a year ago. I'm making better decisions about my life. I've eliminated a lot of stress and realized I don't need to be with anyone to make me happy. I am a lot stronger and more resilient now. I appreciate the people in my life who effect me positively everyday and accept their help because they genuinely care about me. I know that I could not go through this whole experience without my friends and family.
This week is going to be a super busy one. We have so much to do in the house still and we have to move everything out of my apartment. Needless to say, I'm trying to keep busy so I don't go crazy between now and the baby's arrival. Hopefully it will be soon!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I am no longer a Modern Mama. I am a waddling, crabby, tired blimp. My pregnancy clothes are getting snug, I can't tie my own shoes (let alone put them on), and I would give anything for a good night's sleep. I try to put on a good front, but I am praying that the full moon next week will get things going. I don't know if there is any truth behind the moons and gravitational pull, but I will believe just about anything now.
The house is coming along. We have been doing lots and lots and LOTS of work. My mom and dad have been absolutely amazing with all the time they have put into it. I wish I had the money to send them on a vacation for everything they do for me and the baby. Painting is the main agenda it seems now. Hopefully we can get everything we need to do done before the baby gets here.
My last week of work is next week, and then I have to be out of my apartment by the 31st. I figured I might as well keep myself as busy as possible the next 3 weeks. My plate is definately full! It is going to be so weird being off work for so long, but I know I won't be getting much rest.
Hope everyone is getting in the holiday spirit!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
So I received the memory book yesterday in the mail, and I was very disappointed when I discovered how much info was going to be left blank because the "Daddy" info won't be filled out. I would have to rip out at least 3 pages, and I really don't want to do that because I don't want to mess the book up.
All I have to say is when did the choice to be a single parent become a punishment? It is about to be 2011 people! Guess what? More than 1/4 of kids live in a single parent home. You would think that memory books would be more accomodating. I looked online for some that were more single-mom friendly, but apparently being a single parent isn't expensive enough without throwing in a $60 baby memory book. Are you kidding me?! And the ones I found were plain and boring.
All I want is a cute memory book that can satisfy my need to recored and organize my child's first milestones as they happen chronologically. I want somewhere to put his little hand prints, footprints, his first lock of hair, ect. Is that so much to ask for???
Alas, life is hard for single modern mama.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
But I know every nightmare has an end. Not that being pregnant has been that bad, but I am so over it. I'm ready to meet my baby and hold him. It's so strange. I'm really excited about him, but I feel kind of disconnected from him because I haven't actually met him yet.
So Mama Mia and I took our last birthing class this week, and I'm really glad I took them. A lot of people say "Oh, you don't need to take birth classes. They are a waste of time." Screw that! At least now I know what to expect when I show up at the hospital and when I go into labor. We took a tour of the birthing center, I learned some breathing techniques, and it just made me a little more at ease about the whole process. Not that I won't go into total freak out mode when I actually go into labor. Hopefully I can remain calm, but that's what Mama Mia is for, right?
So with Christmas coming, I am going to be kept plenty busy before Skeletor arrives. Between the house, work, and Christmas festivities I will have no time to be nervous about meeting my little punk. I put up my tree today and started decorating. I usually go for a real tree, but this year I opted for a fake tree considering it would be nearly impossible for me to water a real tree. Plus this way I have it for the next couple of years for me and Skeletor. Daniela and I are going to be baking cookies within the next week for clients, friends, and family. I have shopping to do and hopefully will be booked up until the baby arrives. Like I said, no time for nerves to get the best of me!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
So I had an appointment this week and it went really well. Skeletor is growing and moving and progressing along really well. I origninally had my appointment scheduled with the evil Dr. Vogel, but after hearing several horror stories from clients and my own previous experience with him I called and complained. The receptionist was very understanding. She must hear the same complaints from other patients. So my appointment this week and my following one are with different physicians who have a much nicer bed side manner. Unfortunately, Dr. Vogel could still possibly deliver my baby so I basically will have to pray that he will NOT be the delivering doctor.
Mama Mia and I started childbirth classes last week and will have one each week of November. Pretty interesting stuff even though I have been reading up on the "Baby Bible." At least I now know that it will cost $180 to circumcise my little man. Apparently Medicaid believes that this is a purely cosmetic procedure. I beg to differ, and I'm sure that any other man would agree with me. Now I know that in several countries and cultures they do not practice circumcisions, but there are reasons for doing them other than for looks. So, needless to say, my new tv fund is now "Skeletor's cosmetic surgery" fund.
I have so much to do in the next couple of weeks it's ridiculous. We have started working on the house, and hopefully will start painting this weekend. Dad has been working on a few things that needed to be patched up, but all in all I know we will get it done before the baby comes.
Finally, I think I have settled on a name for Skeletor. I figured since he looks less like a skeleton now, it's only fair I start calling him by his name. Now that's not to say it may or may not change when I see him. I was leaning towards Owen Kellum, but then I thought "Do I really want my child's initials to be O.K.?" I mean, that's just asking to be made fun of on the playground. So I'm thinking his name will be Ethan Kellum. However, I did just go see Due Date and Zach Galifinakis's character's name is Ethan. Maybe he will grow up to be a comedian.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
My parents and I left on Wednesday morning and drove the 13 hours it takes to get to Providence. Note to all: 13-hour car rides are not comfy when you are 27 weeks pregnant. I don't think my dad realized how often we were going to have to stop for pee breaks and for me to walk around. Every 2 to 3 hours we had to make a pit-stop. Luckily, dad was understanding. I slept for the majority of the trip. There is something about long distance car rides that just put me to sleep. I woke up in Providence with Megan helping me out of the car. Nice way to arrive after a long drive.
Even though we did a lot of stuff, it was definately relaxing. Plus my parents, sister and I haven't really had family time like that in a while so it was really nice to be a family again. Usually when Meg comes to visit she can only come for a few days and there are so many other people for her to see we don't really get to spend a lot of time together as a family. We went apple picking and to dinner on Thursday and on Friday we went to Newport and shopped around. Mom and Dad left Saturday morning for Maine, and Meg and I went shopping and to a Columbus Day festival in Federal Hill. Then we did some more shopping and had dinner and dessert. It was so nice to not have to work, not have to worry about what I needed to do that day, and not have any stress for a couple of days.
Meg also got to feel Skeletor moving around. He's become so active these days and now other people can feel him too so it's a nice thing to share with others. Meg was also amused by how big my belly has gotten. The last time she saw me was in August at my shower. It's amazing much my belly has grown. Only 12 weeks to go!
I have so much to do in the next couple of weeks it is a little overwhelming. But I'm excited to start working on the house. It is going to be surreal living in my Great Granny's house. I'm happy though. I can finally start working on the nursery and start the nesting process. I have a feeling that this project is going to make my pregnancy fly by.
Speaking of the nursery, I have decided to have a forest theme with trees and owls. Nothing creepy! And I want to find those letters to put on the walls for his initials. I found some cute ideas online at Etsy and at Project Nursery. I've also narrowed down my names. Although I'm not entirely sold on a first name yet, I decided his middle name would be Kellum which is my great granny's maiden name. The contenders for first names are as follows: Owen, Mason, Jonas, and Miles.
I have my next appointment at the end of the month and mom is coming with me! We get to see Skeletor and I'm so excited! Hope everyone has a great week!
Friday, October 1, 2010
So I had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday with the horrible Dr. Vogel. Let me make a declaration: I HATE DR. VOGEL!!!!!
He is a nasty and vile man! Not only was his bedside manner very stale and abrupt, but he proceeded to tell me I was overweight. I admit, I have gained 10 lbs. in one month which was shocking to me when I got on the scale. How did this happen? I hardly eat enough for me let alone for the baby too! I may indulge once a week on a sweet or something, but I do not eat fast food and I make smart choices when it comes to my food. So when he saw my weight gain he automatically assumed that i gorge on burgers, fries, cake, ect. I tried to tell him that if anything I've been concerned about not eating enough, but I got the sense that he didn't believe me. Apparently I was overweight at my last appointment too, even though the other doctor said I was right where I needed to be weight-wise. I wanted to claw Dr. Vogel's eyes out! I don't think I would have been so annoyed if he had also been a little more helpful. He didn't make any suggestions about what I need to be doing to keep a healthy weight or managing my weight. As a health professional, I would have hoped for a little more advice and a little less criticism. Needless to say, I really hope that Dr. Vogel will not be delivering my baby!
On the upside, Skeletor is doing well. Moving around a lot and keeping his mama on her toes with his kicking and jabbing. My glucose test went well also, so no gestational diabetes to worry about. The next visit I get to have another ultrasound, so I'm really excited! Next week I'm off to Providence to visit Auntie Meg and the F.B.I.L. and I'm so looking forward to it. Can't wait to have some fall weather!
Friday, September 24, 2010
One thing that has distracted me has been the constant movement that Skeletor has been doing inside my belly. It is soooo weird!! I cannot believe that their is another human being inside of me right now. It keeps becoming more and more real everytime he kicks me, everytime he switches sides, and everytime i see my belly move. He has been all over the place this past week. It's like he doesn't have enough room inside me, and he is constantly trying to stretch out. For all I know he could be doing laps inside there...although like I said before there probably isn't enough room for that.
I'm going on 26 weeks which means (and I'm hoping) only 11 to 13 weeks left. Damn it's going by fast! To think my little zombie will be here that soon...OH MY GOD! That's so close. Am I ready? Do I have everything I need to be prepared for a baby? Am I going to be a good mama? What if I have a mental meltdown when he gets here? Stop....relax and breathe.
The "Baby Bible" has begun to give advice on labor and birthing classes. I tried to read ahead so I could get informed, but I realized that I am NOT ready for that information. I made the mistake of watching a live birth on YouTube the other day. A little friendly advice: DO NOT WATCH!!! I don't know what I was thinking. I think I'm better off just reading up on the info instead of viewing what my body is going to go through.
Well, the next couple of weeks should be interesting!
Monday, September 13, 2010
To resolve this issue, I have decided that I just have to keep busy. That means lots of working out, going home to The Creek, and anything to pre-occupy my mind. I just need to stay busy and it will all pass. Soon I hope.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Skeletor has also been very active in the past week. He has been kicking up a storm and rolling around in there so much. It is the strangest feeling and it is really difficult to describe. When he kicks it feels like a cross between a muscle spasm and popcorn popping. The other night I had my hand on my stomach and all of a sudden it jumped. He kicked the hell out of me! The left side seem to be his favorite. Sometimes when he shifts sides I can feel him roll through. That is the strangest feeling because the front of my abdomen all of sudden gets really tight and then it's normal again. I feel like the zombie chick in Dawn of the Dead right before she gives birth. Hopefully my little zombie doesn't want to eat the delivering doctor's brains.
Sorry to keep it short today, but I have to get moving so I can feel some movement from him tonight!
Have a great day!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
So it's been awhile since my last post and I apologize for that. It's been a little hectic since my last post with work and I have been exhausted! I think the excitement of the shower and seeing sister took a lot out of me. Plus work has been crazy. On days I want to leave early, I get really busy. On days I'm hoping to be busy, it's dead. But I'd rather be busy than not.
The baby shower was great! My sister did a good job of organizing it and I really enjoyed seeing family and friends. I got a lot of great stuff too! I got a lot of stuff on my registry and a lot of stuff I wouldn't have even thought about. I had no idea what a Bumba was, but I got one. And I definately won't have to worry about Skeletor being naked either. Plenty of cute outfits to put him in! It pays to have people who have been through babies before. They think of everything! I know I said I would post some pics but there should be some on my facebook page from the shower.
So my appetite has been pretty much at an all time low, but the doctor said I'm where I should be as far as size and weight goes. Nothing sounds appetizing to me. Don't get me wrong...if it's put in front of me I will probably eat it. But cooking is not something I enjoy right now. I think it's because I have no idea what I want to make, and I don't want to go through the process of making it either. I'm just too tired to cook. Man, I wish I had a personal chef right now to do that work for me. Hopefully my energy will come back in the next couple of weeks.
To close out on this blog I have a new revised list of names for Skeletor. Apparently, (according to Auntie Meg) he is already a legend with her soon to be nephews. So I have decided to let you guys in on some of my options. (Side note: Meg DO NOT even think of using these names) My list is as follows:
Beckett, Miles, Finn, Eliott, Sullivan, Elias, Owen, Mason, Dexter, and Abram
(These names are interchangable between being first, middle, or either.)
Input is greatly appreciated although that does not mean I will take it into consideration. Lol!
Have a great week!
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Once I get past this week, Skeletor will be on two week intervals for his fruit-veggie-comparison. I have included the link for those of you who are interested to see what produce I will be carrying in the future weeks to come. The website is thebump.com and the chart is under pregnancy tools.
Today is the baby shower so I will have plenty to blog about and pics to include, and yes I will make sure there are some baby bump sitings as well. Hope everyone has a great day!!
Friday, August 13, 2010
Friday, August 6, 2010
Baby Daddy attended the appointment with me on Wednesday. It was kept civil, thankfully. While he did annoy me with his references to his other children and his ex-wife's pregnancy, I took the high road and ignored his comments. He seemed happy during the ultrasound when we got to see the baby, but once the appointment was over we went our separate ways. We didn't get a chance to discuss finances for the baby, so we shall see how civil he will remain after that conversation.
Mama Mia and I started my registery on Wednesday also. It is soooo overwhelming to pick out baby stuff! There are like 6 different bottle brands, pacifiers, nipples, ect. I have no idea if what I picked out is the right stuff or not. But then again, is any specific brand better than the other? Honestly, I will be happy with whatever I receive at my baby showers because I can never make a decision.
Sorry to keep this blog so short, but I'm cooking dinner and it's time for Mama to eat!
Have a great week all!
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
The next day, I woke up early and went to the Department of Social Services to apply for Medicaid. Now, I have insurace but it isn't the greatest. I know that I could not afford to have a baby with my insurance. Not to mention that I work my ass off and pay taxes. I have every right to take advantage of the federal programs offered to those who just can't afford to do it on their own. Anyhow, this task can also take all day to complete from what I understand. However, I was in and out of that office in an hour. And 4 days later, I received my Medicaid card.
The complicated car situation is on it's way to an end as well. The bank will hopefully approve and close on my auto loan on Monday. I was able to negotiate the car dealer down to the price I needed in order to get the loan, too. It made me feel so powerful and adult-like! So hopefully next week my mom can have her car back and I will finally have my own again!!!
Now on to the Great Wax Adventure:
Wednesday I had my first wax appointment...brazilian wax. See, I have decided that there is no way in hell I am going to be able to keep it nice and neat when I have a big huge belly. So I've decided that waxing would be the best solution to this problem. I showed up and Jaycee (waxing extraordinaire) took me back to her room. She was super nice and made me feel at ease, but I will say it was not the most comfortable thing in the world to go through. I dropped my drawers and climbed onto the table. There were stirrups just like at the doctor's office that I put my feet in. And then the process began...and let me say it was a little more painful than I remembered. Thankfully, Jaycee is quick. We talked about the baby and work while she ripped away. Fifteen minutes and I was cleaned up. Apparently I will have to go back in 3-4 weeks and then I will be on a 6 week regimen. And while it was a little painful, I know I won't have to deal with the headache of shaving. Not to mention it will help me prepare for childbirth. If I can make it through a brazilian, then I can make it through labor.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Onto bigger news...my dear friend Mandy gave me some of her bras from her early days and I was completely shocked when I was able to fit comfortably in them. Shocked because they are a size 34DD!!!!! HOLY MOLEY!!! And the scary thing is that are going to continue to grow. These bad boys aren't finished yet. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I guess there is nothing I can do. Now, most women would be excited about this new development, but I on the other hand am not. I like wearing a medium to small sized shirt. None of my tops fit anymore, growing belly aside. But I guess that's just one of the many "perks" of being pregnant.
Well off to try to accomplish more "man work." Wish me luck!
Friday, July 16, 2010
My belly is not the only thing growing. My boobs are the biggest they have EVER been. I don't even know what to do with these things. They hurt all the time. I can't run, I can't wear certain bras, and I'm overflowing the cuppage in my bras that do fit comfortably. Although I will say, I'm tempted to take a picture of them. That way if they look horrible after the peanut is born, I can save up and I know what I want them to look like. Apparently they will only grow more as I get further along. AHHH!!! I don't know if I can handle anymore growth!
Sorry to keep this one short and sweet but I have a puppy to take for a walk. There will be more tomorrow!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Back to the Taco Bell comment from above. Lately, since my appetite has picked up, I have noticed that whenever someone talks about a particular food or brings it around me, I start to crave it. Scratch that, I NEED it! Case in point, Tuesday night at work I had like three different conversations with people where they were talking about pizza. Now I had already packed my yummy healthy dinner of baked chicken, green beans, and home made mac-&-cheese (thank you mama for the recipe). But that looked like dog food compared to the deliciousness of gooey cheese, garlicky crust, and delightful mushrooms. I ate my healthy dinner, but I ate it for lunch. And since the little bugger inside burns everything I eat off so quickly, I was starving when I got home. So what did I do? Your damn right....I ordered pizza. It was delicious until my stomach began to hurt. I remembered why I don't usually eat pizza, the cheese makes my tummy hurt. Same thing with Taco Bell. My friend had it the other night, and I immediately felt that it was something I had to have. No more I tell you! I don't want to hear anymore about what people are eating!!! I must remain healthy...I mean I hate fast food. But apparently my baby thinks it scrumptious.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Took my ass to the gym today and this mamasita is determined to go at least 4 days a week. Now before any of you can comment, my doctor and the Bible both say that 4 days is safe for the peanut and good for me too. So that being said, I am ready! I refuse to have people think I'm fat and not pregnant! Not to mention I am NOT gaining more than what was recommended to me by my doctor. Let the resolution begin!
So within this past week I have begun to experience "growing pains" or as I like to call them "the cramps that feel like my insides are being ripped out." These are NOT FUN!!!! These lovely little aches are the result of the ligaments in my uterine muscles stretching. Sounds awesome huh? They always seem to hit me later in the evening too or when I'm out doing something. I have found the only relief comes from me laying down which I know is a good thing. I should be taking it easy and relaxing, but I have a problem. I can't sit still or just relax. I feel like I always have something to do, so I guess I'm going to have to start listening to my body and chill out. Plus I'm hoping the gym will help with them as well.
I have also started feeling like I have butterflies in my tummy. Now it may be in my head, but the Bible says that sometimes in the 4th month you start to feel fluttering in your stomach. The fluttering is the baby. It happens late at night or when I've been sitting still for a long period of time. Call me dramatic or call it wishful thinking, but I think my baby is moving around already quite a bit and I can feel it happening.
Well, that's it for now. Bowie is pawing at me to get off the computer and I have dinner to cook. I'm taking the professional's advice and taking it easy tonight!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
I digress. So yesterday I had my second dr. appointment and it was probably the longest I have ever spent in a medical office. Baby Daddy came along and that made for an awkward reunion, but the appointment itself went well. We had to divulge our deep and darkest secrets to a nurse who was very nice and smiley. More like I gave her all of my medical history (which I suspect surprised
Baby Daddy a little) and my family's medical history. I hope this kid inherits some good health genes. I am healthy as a horse but my family...not so much in the cardiovascular department. But I honestly believe that a lot of those issues can be controlled by diet and physical activity, and I plan on my child living a healthy lifestyle.
After what seemed life half my day in the nurse's office, I met Dr. #1 of the six that I will be seeing at my OB office. She was very nice and made several helpful suggestions to me. We then got to hear the heartbeat, and that was very surreal for me. The little peanut has a strong heartbeat thankfully. Then we heard it kicking! It's funny but aside from the exhaustion, nausea, and sore boobs, I never really feel pregnant until I go to the doctor. It's as if I don't believe it until I see the baby or hear it's little heartbeat. I can't wait until I can feel it moving or kicking. Then I will know it's definately real. Even Baby Daddy got excited about hearing peanut kick.
That being said, (and I will keep this real short) Baby Daddy and I are now on a need to know basis about the baby. My honesty about my expectations of our relationship did not sit well with him unfortunately. I have resolved, and I will teach my child the same philosophy, that it is not fair to sacrafice one's self or beliefs to make someone else happy. I love who I am. Yes, I may have some areas I need to work on, but overall I should not apologize for who I am. You cannot make anyone else happy until you are happy yourself, and I'm sticking to my guns on this subject.
This modern mama has some errands to run!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Hoping to feel better,
Monday, June 21, 2010
What I'm really hoping for from this little vacay is to totally relax and just forget about all the stress in my life. Nikki has that effect on me. I feel like San Francisco will allow me to mellow out and come back in a zen like state.
Back to the packing!!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Good Night All!
Friday, June 18, 2010
THESE ARE NOT HEALTHY CRAVINGS!!!!! So if anyone has any suggestions on what I can do about finding healthier alternatives to these cravings, I would be deeply appreciative. Thank goodness my energy is going back up 'cause this mama will definately be at the gym if she eats any of the above!